New Year's Eves as a Mom

This post would probably be most appropriately titled: “Why I Don’t Miss Partying Period”, but since it’s New Year’s Eve we’ll discuss that particular party.  Just know that this pretty much applies for my entire life, not just one night of the year.

I used to wonder where the biggest party was at on New Year’s Eve.  I used to be concerned about who I would surround myself with, what would be on tap, and what sort of delectable bites would be on hand.  I never spent my New Year’s Eve in Times Square, but I had a few adventures in Mexico, late nights that turned in to mornings, and memories that will last me a lifetime.  And I still don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.  Maybe next year when I have an almost four-year-old and an almost one-year-old I’ll muster up the energy to head out for a few hours.  This year is not that year.  And it hasn’t really been that way ever since Cora was born.  It’s just impossible for motherhood to not change the way you view your previous life.  What used to be cool just seems lame now.  What used to keep you up at night worrying now barely passes through your mind.  Cool is now defined by what kind of sippy cups you have and the worries have shifted to someone else’s well being instead of just your own.

It appears that motherhood has completely erased my desire to party in to the wee hours, but don’t feel bad for me: I’ll still be having a ton of fun tonight.  Here’s 5 reasons why I don’t miss my New Year’s Eves before I became a mom.

1.  It’s exhausting.

A few months ago I was talking to my sister on the phone as she was getting ready for a college party.  It wasn’t even going to start until midnight, so she hadn’t even showered yet at 10 pm.  I, on the other hand, was snuggled warmly in my bed with nothing but the back of my eyelids in my plans for the evening.  And you know what? It didn’t bother me a bit.  Even when I was in college I thought the whole process of going out was tedious.  You spend hours picking out your outfit, prepping, pre-gaming, deciding where to go, and then by the time you finally get to the destination it’s about two hours from closing and you’re wiped out.  But I did it back then, and I kept it up until I had kids because that was life.  You would think caring for a toddler would be more of an energy drain, but in my opinion it’s the other way around.

2.  It’s scary.

Although I was fortunate that I never experienced any major trauma, the thought of drunk drivers on the road always scared me on New Year’s Eve.  You know they’re out there, and you know you’re away from home and will probably have to take a road to get there at some point that evening.  I would much rather stay in my comfortable abode now, ring in the New Year safely, and call it done.  Do I sound like your grandma yet?  According to one study I read, “compared to the average weekend night the 12-hour window between 6 p.m. on Dec. 31 and 6 a.m. on Jan. 1 tends to have about 71% more crashes where alcohol or drugs are listed as a contributing factor.”  Yeah, I’ll stay home with my babies, thanks.

3.  It’s not as meaningful.

Crazy partying is just obnoxious to me now.  You can’t hear anything, the music is relentless, and you hardly know anyone at the place.  I would much rather have actual conversations with the ones I love, and be surrounded by friends and family who want the best for me, not just want me to take another shot.  I’m not saying people who do go out on New Year’s Eve aren’t having a meaningful night, it’s just not my definition of the word anymore.  And it feels so, so far from my every day life it’s almost uncomfortable.

4.  It’s not my people.

In a similar vein, I often spent my New Year’s Eves of yesteryear surrounded by people I kind-of, sort-of knew.  Now the only people I really can’t live without are my husband and my babies, and I don’t have to go to a bar to find them.  Actually, that would be kind of disturbing if I did.  I know myself well enough to know that if I went out this New Year’s Eve (aside from attracting all kinds of looks for being pregnant), I would just be sitting there wondering if Cora’s still awake, if she’s counting down to midnight, if she’s having fun.  Sure, she’s only two, but celebrating holidays with her only continues to be more and more fun, which is the opposite of how I feel about my pre-mom partying days.

5.  It’s not what it’s all about.

Getting hammered drunk on New Year’s Eve is completely pointless to me.  Who wants to start off January 1st with a terrible headache and sleep half the day away?  If I sleep in it’s going to be because a toddler kept me up til midnight.  If I wake up to the sound of familiar little footsteps instead of wondering where I am or who I’m sleeping next to, it’s going to be a good day.  Because ushering out the old and bringing in the new year for me now means remembering how much Cora has grown in the past year, and getting excited to welcome a new little bundle in 2015.  And surprisingly, I am totally content.

Whatever your plans are for tonight, I hope you’re safe, happy, and most of all, surrounded by exactly who and what you want.  Because in the end, that’s all that really matters.

XO,

A