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When we left off in Part One (read that here if you haven’t already), I was just starting to feel some light contractions on the evening of March 14th after an appointment with my midwife.  We headed home and settled into our usual routine of dinner and board games to pass the time.  Yup, my mom, my sister Kelsey, and Orlando were playing Monopoly while I was in labor.  Of course, at this point I hadn’t really acknowledged that I was officially in labor yet.  With both my sisters having to fly home the next day and my labor with Cora being SO long, I didn’t want to get anyone’s hopes up in case it was a false alarm or the start of a very long early labor.  So I would be sitting at the table for dinner, or watching the game of Monopoly play out (Orlando did terribly by the way, not a good sign for the father of your children to be mismanaging funds as you’re about to trust him with your life 😉 ) and a contraction would come along, but I would just stand up or roll over to let it pass by as calmly as possible.

Eventually around 7 pm I decided it was time to start my birth project.  For those of you who aren’t aware, a birth project is a recommendation by some midwives and natural birth advocates to have planned for when you’re in the earliest stages of labor but need to keep your mind off things for a bit.  You can cook something, clean, organize a bookshelf, knit a sweater, whatever will help you connect with what your body is doing but allow you to feel like you’re being productive with that initial surge of energy.  I even heard one midwife who said to bake chocolate chip cookies, and when you start to burn a batch, you’re in active labor. 🙂 I had decided to make cupcakes (BIRTHday cupcakes as it would turn out) for my project, so I set to work mixing and beating in between contractions.  My sister Hadley later told me I was freaking her out because I would be in the middle of baking, stop and start pacing around the room through a contraction, and then go back to baking once it passed.  She was studying at the kitchen table and didn’t want to look at me for fear that I would see she was a little worried.  It probably didn’t help that I also started using my birth mantra at this point too, so as I was pacing around I was breathing out saying, “Open” in a long, drawn out moan as well.  For my poor sister who has never experienced someone else’s labor before, much less had a child of her own, I could see how this would be a little disconcerting. 🙂

My birth mantra was to remind myself that my body needed to open up physically and mentally in order for this baby to be born.  As the contractions (or “rushes” as I was calling them at the time to avoid a restrictive connotation like contract) got stronger, I kept repeating that single word, “Open”, over and over again and I truly believe it was one of the factors that made this labor go so much faster.  Although at the time I didn’t realize it was moving quickly, since my mom remembers asking me if I felt like it was progressing like Cora’s labor and I said no, and I wasn’t interested in timing my contractions at all.  My mom started timing them for her own sanity though, and realized that without a doubt I was moving much, much faster.

Around 9 pm, after dinner I decided to lay down for a bit to get some rest if this was going to be the real thing.  At this point I texted my doula, Tina, to let her know I was having pretty steady, strong contractions, and she let me know she was ready to head my way when I said the word.  Orlando and I laid down in the bedroom, softly working through each contraction and resting in between.  I think it was at this point my mom went to put Cora to bed, but I’m not entirely sure.  All I know is it was getting harder and harder to take my mind off each contraction.

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When we let my midwife Jennifer know I was in labor, she suggested trying a warm bath to ease the pain and to keep her updated.  I know I mentioned liking the water my first time around with Cora, but it was infinitely better in my own tub, in my own house, surrounded by candles and my birth playlist in the background.  I was having a significant amount of back labor again this time around, and I could remember that with Cora it helped to be on all fours to get her to shift around and keep things moving.  Add that to the list of reasons why this labor moved so much faster, too.  I didn’t waste time in endless early labor because I knew what my body needed to get the baby off my back and into the locked and loaded position.  TMI? 🙂

One element we didn’t factor in with a home birth was Frenchie, our dog.  She was on high alert the entire time I was in labor, probably sensing something big was happening and feeling overprotective as a result.  She was constantly barking at every single noise and Orlando kept feeling the need to check on what she was barking at.  Being in my blunt, overly candid labor mentality, I can remember at one point snapping, “Where is Orlando?! Why does he keep checking on Frenchie?! SOMEONE ELSE NEEDS TO DO THAT!” So it became my poor sister Hadley’s job to check on Frenchie every time she freaked out.  In case you think my sister Kelsey got off easy, it was her job to pour water on my lower back every time I had a contraction.  They must both really love me. 😉

At this point someone, probably my mom, realized it was time to call Tina, which was a good thing since it wasn’t too long after she arrived that she realized it was time to call Jennifer, my midwife.  Another reason this labor moved faster? TINA.  She was an amazingly calming presence, held my hand through every contraction, and just generally made me feel more empowered through my labor.  And this was at home.  If I was having a hospital birth I would 100% want a doula by my side, absolutely.  Once Jennifer arrived, she checked me, and I was fully expecting to be ready to start pushing.  When she said I was 6 centimeters, my heart sunk a little.  I was 8 when I was checked the first time with Cora, and my labor was still another four hours.  I think it was about midnight or one in the morning by now, and Jennifer suggested we get out of the tub and try laboring on the birthing ball for a bit to try and speed things up.  It was probably only another half an hour of incessant contractions before Jennifer checked me again and BAM I was 10 centimeters. I also began to have that intense need to push. It was go time, baby!

Orlando was sitting in front of me on the bed, I was on the birthing ball, and Tina was sitting behind me massaging my lower back through each contraction.  At the time, I was so intensely focused (some would call it Laborland) that I didn’t realize I was pinching Orlando’s sides every time I held on to him through the pain.  He also said he was trying hard not to laugh when I was pulling on his neck to get through it and causing his head to bob around like crazy.  The mental image is hilarious, so I’m glad I was keeping my eyes closed at the time.  Otherwise I may have totally lost my concentration to see such a sight. 🙂

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Push after push went by and I wasn’t making much progress, so Jennifer suggested we get back in the tub.  I was able to walk over and lower myself back into the heavenly water.  Speaking of heavenly, throughout the entire labor, my mom was reading scriptures I had posted around the tub, and a birthing prayer that was included in our birthing kit.  With Cora I didn’t do a lot of these smaller details, but it made such a difference with Issa.  It instantly calmed me down, helped me remember why I was doing this, and perhaps most importantly reminded me that I wasn’t alone.  Because as much as it helps to have family or friends by your side during labor, it’s still just you and your baby that have to get through this experience.  No one can do it for you, and that can feel a little terrifying when the millionth contraction is bearing down on you and you’re not sure you can take much more.  It was in those moments I needed to hear that God was with me, I don’t need to be afraid, He was going to see me through this.

This stretch of the evening feels like the longest, but it was probably only an hour, max.  I continued to push with each wave, with Jennifer telling me when she could feel a push was effective and when I needed to find more strength.  I remember at one point rising up out of the water right as Issa was crowning, almost trying to escape from the pain.  Funny how we sometimes convince ourselves we actually have the capability to do that, right? 🙂 With one ginormous push, I could finally feel Issa’s head coming out, but I remember the contraction fading quickly at that point.  With her still underwater, I was able to reach down and feel my baby’s head, and take just the tiniest of breaks before the next rush.  I remember touching her tiny little head, feeling that she had a full head of hair, and just telling her over and over again that it’s ok, it’s time to come out now, Mommy’s not scared.  With another final burst of strength, Issa Brooke made her entrance into the world and up onto my chest within seconds, just like her big sister.

Her labor was just around 8 hours from start to finish, which was like a sprint compared to Cora’s marathon of over 24 hours.  It wasn’t any easier though, in fact it felt just as difficult, simply crammed into a smaller amount of time.  Because of that though, I felt much more present in the moments after her birth.  With Cora it was like, “Oh my god, there’s a baby, thank goodness, now can I please rest for a bit?” With Issa I felt that huge rush of emotions and just wanted to ogle at her, telling her over and over again how much I loved her, how beautiful she was, how happy I was that she was here.  And in another example of God’s perfect timing, within minutes of Issa’s birth, Cora walked into the room after waking up on her own to meet her baby sister.  I have no idea how she slept through her mother hollering right below her bedroom, but she did and she was still able to be there to experience Miss Issa’s arrival.

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Issa clocked in at 8 lbs 15 oz., and 22 1/4 inches long, born on March 15th at 2:49 am.  So far she is just the calmest, easiest baby ever.  It’s made the transition from one to two almost eerily simple, so much so that I’m afraid to type that for fear of jinxing it.  I’m so happy we were able to have the birth we wanted, and I have no doubt the way she came into the world has something to do with how tranquil she is.  Even though it was hard, even though there were moments I had to push through mental barriers, it was 100% worth it to be able to be in the comfort of our own home, with no unnecessary interventions to complicate our bond with each other.  Once again I wouldn’t have been able to do it without my midwife Jennifer, Orlando, my mom, and it meant so much to have Tina and my sisters there this go around.

Speaking of my sisters, I hope the experience was inspiring and didn’t traumatize them for life.  I hope they now see that their bodies are perfectly capable of laboring naturally, and they too can find the strength within to bring life into the world.  Giving birth doesn’t have to be something that’s hidden behind a hospital curtain and never spoken about afterwards.  Each woman’s experience is different, and although some choose different routes than others, it’s an important rite of passage that has no other option than to change you forever.  Even though this was my second time, I still feel like a different person, once again, than I was before.  I feel even stronger, even more confident in my own abilities, and I know I can tackle mothering two just like I did birthing two.

XO,

A