Dear neighbor,
Since my husband, daughter and I have been living in Mexico, I’ve seen you here and there, only in passing. I know you’re a student at the local University, and it has always seemed as though you and your roommate have kind spirits and good heads on your shoulders. So we usually turn a deaf ear when you’re having parties late at night, to a certain point. However, a few months ago you were making enough noise that sick babies were in danger of being awakened from much needed sleep. Our husbands were out of town, so a fellow neighbor and myself decided to ask you to please turn down the volume or perhaps move the party elsewhere. Imagine our surprise when, instead of you, we were greeted by a strange man who said that you weren’t there. I hope you can then understand our logic to call our landlord to resolve the issue since you weren’t available. NOW try to imagine our frustration when, at the knock of our landlord, YOU answered the door, apparently too high and mighty to respond to your lowly neighbors.
We tried to reason with you. In a language we don’t speak very well. In a foreign country where we don’t understand the noise disturbance laws or police policies. We tried to explain in Spanish that our babies are sleeping, that we don’t mind the partying, as long as it stays within reasonable hours and a reasonable volume. We really, honestly, tried. At one point we even asked if you could send down your English-speaking friend to translate for us so we could communicate better. “I understand English,” you spat. “Well, could we speak to you in English, please?” we simply asked. Your response threw me for a loop. For a mind-numbing, hurt-inspiring loop. “No quiero hablar en Ingles, estamos en Mexico, verdad?” (Rough translation: I don’t want to talk in English, we’re in Mexico, right?)
The last part you didn’t really speak to us, it was more an egocentric jab to our landlord, looking for his confirmation that we should be forced to speak Spanish because we’re in “your” country. You’re young, so I don’t think you truly understood what a selfish statement that was. What I want to say to you, is that I hope you never, ever, have to experience the kind of cultural bias you subjected us to, should you ever visit “my” country.
You see, in the States, some people drive around with these moronic bumper stickers that obnoxiously shout, “You’re in America, Speak English” Actually, some of them spell “you’re”as “your” which is both horribly ironic and difficult for me to repeat, even if it is a direct quote. But the point is, I have ALWAYS felt (even before I married a Mexican-American man) that these people don’t truly understand what it means to be American, or a citizen of the world for that matter. Language is something that doesn’t belong in one country, but not another. It doesn’t belong to anyone. In fact, countries don’t belong to individuals either. They’re constantly evolving and changing. Language is not something that you leave when you cross the borders to a new culture. It’s something that can divide us, sure, but it can also bring us together.
It makes me laugh to discover new words in Spanish that are similar in English. It’s a challenge to find ways to communicate thoughts and ideas with words that feel funny and awkward at first. Living in Mexico off and on over the past four years, it’s been fun to learn a whole new culture, and I’ve met more friendly faces than not. But when you refused to meet me halfway and speak a little English while I spoke a little Spanish it built a wall, it didn’t do anything to break one down. What the world needs right now isn’t more people saying, “This is MY country, speak MY language.” Instead, what we need is people saying, “Welcome to my country, I’d love to learn more about where you came from.”
Please understand that I’m saying this to everyone, in every country, not just you. I have not and I will NEVER speak to someone visiting or living in the United States the way you spoke to me. I know now first-hand how hurtful it feels, how cold. I just hope someday you’ll realize why this is important for a better future in this crazy, mixed-up world.
Sincerely,
Your neighbor
